so as im creeping on myself and going through my pics there are these three that just make my stomach drop. Usually when i type about a girl, you usually assume it’s Talia, but i hav finally forgot the feelings. This girl was the one after. Set up by a friend and it just happened like nothing was forced, but it happened. You know how there is that general cliche of she could always make me smile, but this girl honestly could. She made the most adorable faces ive ever seen. everytime i see a picture of her i realized i never should have made the decision of not taking her back.
She is a person of the past who i still maintain a good friendship with. No matter what though my feelings are always for one girl. I know if you read this you will know its you. You’ve known about the way ive felt about you for 6 years and how they have gone back for 8. you hav always been there, even when i wasnt. You say the reason were not together is cuz i didnt stick around.. The funny thing is i hav. How come to this day i still hav the same feelings ive had since 6th grade?? My mom asks if you are single everyday after i see you. Everytime im with you all i wanna do is hold your hand and hold you. Nothing made me feel worst and happy at the same time as did you telling me you wish we would hav tried and that you know we would make a better couple. I know your going to read this and i want you to know that i love you and not like one of those half ass ones you say to friends as you say goodbye, but with all my heart i truly love you. you are the only picture in my dorm for my reason cuz you are the only person i want to be with. If you truly believe we will never work out plz just tell me so i can store these feelings away for a while. You will always be my short bus dingleberry:]
Cunts & Guns,
i fuccing hate women
Who the fucc made women the ones i control? why the fucc do we waste half our goddamn time looking for someone to be with? why the fucc do we date if we know were only bound to get hurt?? i hate fuccing women. i hate how i am nice to every girl who i think is cute when theyre a straight up two faced bitch to me. I hate how i get trampled on as if im useless like the earth below us. im way too fuccing nice and many people may disagree with this statement but you can fucc off because it cuz i dont care about you enough to be nice. 2 bitches this year hav fucing used me and i fuccing hate them for it. i may be all happy to you but if you really knew what i was thinking you would see the hate thats behind my smile. im done being nice to people who dont deserve it. fucc this bullshit that i go through with every fuccin girl i get interested in. im going numb and not giving a fucc about anyone. i care too much about people and im stoppin. fucc this bullshit and goodnight
what i hate about people
Ok so im really pissed off right now and noone is up to txt to let this out so here goes some venting. I hate when people are youre best friend when its just you and them and then when youre around different people its completely different. To me youre fuccing fake for doing that. Be the friend you claim to be at all times. Second i hate that you expect me to respect everything you hate but you forget everything that i hate. ok maybe youll forget the first couple of times but after a while you should get the point. Third if you come to me wanting advice cuz you dont know how to deal with youre problems, dont do the opposite of what i said that you agreed upon. If you want my advice fuccing use it then. I thought being too good friend was just something that happened in high school, but it seems that it only carried through. fucc this shit i need a fuccing friend like myself. i hope people realize how good i am or shits going to change
so i was pretty sick yesterday and every minute of school was torture. well more than usual. I was just wishing i could be home but im a man so i got through it. so i realized that i hav a new person i can call my best friend. I can tell when im a persons best friend when i do anything to make somebody happy. Unfortunately that means i had to do the harry potter dance with amanda. Its just a disgusting dance that they did in the latest harry potter movie but it will always make a person happy. I cant wait till this year is over, but im going to miss alot of people. My stomach is feeling weird… hope i dont throw up. i want some cookies right now.
so i need a prom date, but its my goal to ask our valedictorian. haha i would sincerely take her but she justs keep rejecting cuz i got so much swag. lol but yeah anyways it will happen. so i saw my ex today all alone in a vacant hallway, thank god for cell phones cuz i just whistled kids by MGMT as i passed by her. phew it was a close call of actually making eye contact with her. I love the movie signs. it used to scare the crap out of me when i was little but now i hav come to enjoy it so much and can enjoy watching it almost everyday. i cant wait for college to come. i got rejected from uf but who cares, and got wait listed for a&m which im not interested in that. so that means in like 5 months im going to be a bulldog. Man i got to get a cowbell haha. Im making a group for prom and im pretty hopeful it will not be stressful cuz thats one less thing i need in my life right now. i want it to go smoother than a babys bottom. anyways i hav made a mistake i shouldnt hav. oh well i hope it goes away.
jumpin on these boys as if i was donkey kong
you know everytime i rap i create the knew hit song
ill steal ur girl like bowser did with peach
my fame status is one that you can never reach
blowing you away as if i was samus
pretty soon ill be away walking on MSU’s campus
cunts & guns,
so im in a really random bad mood right now. i hate when this happens which makes it even worse. and also i come home from work and all i hear is question after question about my day from my parents. I DONT FEEL LIKE FUCKING TALKING! i hate when they get upset when i just dont feel like talking. its my fucking decision to not want to talk. God i cant wait to move out. So i burned by neck at work and it really hurt and its still stinging. so this whole fucking prom business is really stupid. I dont feel like finding a date cuz its such a big fucking deal to everyone. So i thought my best friend was going to go with me but then she says i should get a real date. are you kidding me, your my best friend i will have fun with you no matter what. like i know you and my other best friend are over but you dont hav to not go. and then another person would only go if i went with her friends. fuck you this is my prom im not letting you tell me how it should go. seriously fuck this shit. its going to be overdone for one night of fun that im going to spend probably half a grand on. like just thinking about this is really not making me want to go. And some bitch today tried to make herself look better than me, but fuck you bitch when i prove you wrong then you just start insulting me. learn how to argue dumb bitch. every day you try to make urself look better just cause you dont like what im saying. fuck this seriusly
i hate this shit and want to move on with my life
bitches and hoes always giving me strife
i dont want to see alot of people when i leave
bitches thinking highly of themselves is my biggest pet peeve
this life is becomeing redundant and boring to the point of breaking
still everytime i see this one girl she has my heart and still keeps taking
i dont want to live in misery and distress
cuz bitch you like kanye wests song devil in a new dress
seriously i want to melt away into the sands of time
cuz the life i am living isnt sublime.
cunts & guns,
so today I was watching a show and they showed a clip of a group of orcas that I have seen thousands of times. its where these orcas race toward an iceberg and dive below it at the last second to create a giant wave that sweeps a seal off of it and into the water to be eaten. holy crap these creatures are pretty much beyond amazing. they are so smart that scientists believe they hav different cultures among the different pods in places of the world. they are even saying different species. I wonder how whales think but what am I kidding orcas aren’t even whales they’re just oversized dolphins.they can kill other dolphins and even whales. they even kill sharks and hav been seen killing great white sharks. if I practiced Buddhism I Wish to be reincarnated into an orca. I could talk all day about them not even going to lie. but i won’t cuz i might go insane haha
cunts and guns,
so this weekend was a very very good. Spending the whole three days with my best friend was so much more than i can ask for. I loved every minutes cuz i also got to see my friend ryan and kim. Man this sucks because now i may want to go A&M but who knows. I hav to get my acceptance letter back first. I was so tired though but i cant wait to go back again. WOOHOO
cunts and guns,